Not Me Monday

1. I did NOT wear my bathing suit under my clothes all day yesterday despite the fact that I never stepped foot in a pool.


2. I did NOT wash my hair with Bella's baby shampoo this morning after I discovered I had run out of my own.


3. I did NOT run to Albertsons in my pj's with my hair all frumpled at 6:30 this morning to get a new coffee creamer just so I could have my morning cup of coffee


4. I did NOT literally gag when my garbage disposal threw up all over me as I was cleaning my sink this morning.


5. I did NOT discover a nasty day old poopy diaper I had forgotten about in my kitchen trash.


6. I did NOT eat sugar cookies and goldfish crackers for dinner with friends last night.


7. I did NOT hang up well worn and dirty clothes in my closet because I was too lazy to run a load of laundry. Speaking of which, I am NOT currently wearing the shorts I've worn three consecutive days in a row... that just unsanitary and totally NOT me.


8. I did NOT attempt to iron my t-shirt with my hair flat iron yesterday before going out.


9. I do NOT consider pushing my vacuum around my apartment my workout for the day


10. Speaking of working out, I am NOT currently obsessed with exercising to Justin Timberlake's "Sexy Back" song.


11. And last but not least, I am NOT counting down the hours to watching the Bachelorette tonight with my sister.